Another loud voice in the Internet wilderness

OK my Oscar pics were so-so. I got Best Actor and supporting Actor right. I picked wrong on Best Picture , Actress (That’s what I get for listening to a Met fan), and waffling on Best Supporting Actress picking a tie (What was I thinking?) I saw most of the telecast after it was over as I was invaded by people demanding to see the Knick/Heat game. (roll-call for those of you who care and those of you I mean Lisa P.-(in order of appearance: Oooga,  Tofi, World Famous DJ Manny Styles, Raymi, DJ Ramz and his sidekick Cisco, The artist formerly known as the Redhead Kingpin aka Jeff, Kristina, and recent birthday boy Simon Toussaint Castro)

If you've never seen this trainwreck make it your business to so

Other random thoughts:

• Who had sex with James Franco and offered him the hosting job? He looked about as interested as a 3 year old in church. Anne Hathaway seemed to be hosting on her own.
• Wanna know why the show takes so long? Stop paying homage to movies from 1939. We get it the movies have a rich history. We don’t need to relive all of  it EVERY year. When I saw that Gone with the Wind nonsense starting up, I thought “oh god I’ll be here til Midnight!”
• Speaking of paying homage, who was the idiot in charge of the “In Memoriam” sequence? I’m sorry Corey Haim wasn’t as beloved by the academy snobs as art directors and agents who passed but there were a lot of people who liked his work. And even if the Academy could even make a case against including Corey, there’s no reason leaving Peter Graves, Betty Garrett and Last Tango in Paris’s Maria Schneider off.
• Kirk Douglas looked like as my father would put it-“Death eating a soda cracker”. And he STILL had more energy than James Franco.
• Four words that seem strange to me when put together:  Oscar Winner Trent Reznor.
• Now I’m no Tim Gunn (and if he was here he’d say thank god for that) but after seeing those all white outfits I thought “Wait a minute what happened to no white after Labor day?”

• Why exactly did Billy Crystal taunt us by showing up with that monologue in the middle of  the show? Why couldn’t he host the whole show?
• What happened to Jack Nicholson?
• I don’t give a shit. Melissa Leo was being herself.
• Its a shame that there are NO black actors besides Halle Berry. At least that’s the way it seems watching the Oscars. I would almost rather see Mario van Peeples presenting than Jake “Huh?” Gyllenhaall. Almost.  No I take it back, Sonny Spoon** is more entertaining than Maggie’s brain dead brother.
• My caveman friend Oooga stopped by (Yes that what he’s called) and commented that he thought that Scarlet Johansen was getting banged in the Limo on that way to the Oscars. By that state of her hair here I’m not too disinclined to agree with him.
  

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  **This is one of those references I have to keep explaining to some of my younger friends. Mario Van Peeples  who happens to be  one of my most detested characters in Hollywood used to have a TV show on NBC called Sonny Spoon. Wikipedia’s overview describes it as “Sonny Spoon starred Mario Van Peebles as Sonny, a hip, black private investigator who used his street smarts and “cool” persona to solve crimes. He often assisted, and was assisted by, Carolyn Gilder (Terry Donahoe), an attractive assistant district attorney. Additionally, Sonny was a master of disguises, and might spend part of any given episode dressed as a clergyman, an Arab tourist, or an old lady. He used his many connections on the streets and relationships with friends and informants (who were apparently attracted to him mostly by his vibrant personality, as he had little cash to share with them) to further his ends, and also the insights of his father, Mel, a bar owner (played by Melvin Van Peebles, Mario’s real-life father).”  This description does it no justice.it’s the reason people started watching basic cable channels trust me.