Today in Retail…..
The day after Xmas is usually for returns, not dealing with folks who have no idea what they’re talking about
Here are 3 of today’s winners….
1. Customer “Do you have the Bluetooth”? I’m like “What?”
“The Bluetooth!”
Turns out he wanted an earpiece so he could talk on his phone. Looked like a livery cab driver to me.
2. “I NEED A CHARGER SO I CAN CHARGE THREE DIFFERENT TYPES OF PHONES!”
‘Three Different types of phones?’
“THREE DIFFERENT TYPES OF PHONES I SAW IT ON THE INTERNET. IT HAS PLUGS FOR THREE DIFFERENT TYPES OF PHONES”
‘There are two types of phones iPhone and Android with different….’
“I SAW IT ONLINE. THEY TOLD ME TO GO TO THE APPLE SECTION BUT THERE IS NO ONE THERE. I NEED ONE TODAY IM LEAVING THE COUNTRY TOMORROW “
(So you walk across the store to confuse me? I ask him if he has a picture of this amazing device on his phone. He pats his pockets and says he has no phone.
I walk him over to the Apple section and explain how iPhones use lightning cables and Androids use USB -C ports.
‘So you take this cable and plug this end into your iPhone and this end into the power adapter to charge it. And there’s one for Androids as well. I don’t know what 3rd kind of plug you’re talking about except Mini USB, but they don’t make phones with those anymore.’
“NO NO NO….WAIT I HAVE ONE”
He reaches into his pocket and pulls out…. a portable phone battery. He wanted a small one so it could fit in her purse. I take him over to the mobile section and set him up with a 5000mAh energizer battery.
“WILL THAT FIT IN A WALLET?”
‘I thought you wanted one to fit in her purse. Look how small this is compared to the one you showed me. And it’s only 19.99’
“ILL TAKE IT. THANK YOU VERY MUCH! HAPPY HOLIDAYS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU!”
As he walked away 2 sups who overheard this exchange complimented me for dealing with him. I started to reply that I should have choked him out at the Apple section and placed his body under the table and blamed the Apple rep. Some thoughts are best kept to one’s self sometimes.
3. “I need HDMI Bluetooth. Wireless. (Saw the confused look on my face) For Gaming. “
Me: “You’ll have to ask a blueshirt. I have no idea what you’re talking about. “
Rodneyrants 
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